Something's Happening Here

I, like many other Presidents, am a member of the Millennial Generation. We are the children born and raised during the most abysmal, unquestioned, unchallenged period in American history. And as I watch the millions of people gathered on the National Mall in Washington this week to witness the inauguration of a new leader, I am reminded of all we have missed.

We have never been a part of a revolution. We haven’t seen any form of emancipation. We did not experience Camelot, had no part in any New Deals, and haven’t seen anybody important killed before our eyes. We have no great war, no great jobs, and no true freedom. We have claimed no steak in our democracy, haven’t fought for anything.

But we have read…and read…and read…and read about greatness.

We couldn’t see Elvis shake his hips or girls collapse at the sight of the Beatles. We did not storm the beaches of Normandy. We cannot safely hitchhike across the country. We do not dance naked in public, and we never got to experience a bomb drill in school. We cannot truly grasp King’s dream, and we will never be able to make original rock n roll music.

But we have waited…and waited…and waited…and waited for our time.

We haven’t the balls to REALLY challenge our Establishment, and every time we have sex we know that it could kill us. Smoking is bad and drinking can cost us our futures in several ways. We bury ourselves with video games and online social networking. We blog as if we have something to say. We watch shows about people trying to make friends with celebrities, and create our music by voting on our cell phones.

But I finally feel as though I have seen a glimpse of America…of that thing that my parents and grandparents have talked about, that I have read about in books and listened to on records-You know, that "land of the free" crap that we’ve heard so much about. That little glimpse of greatness that will add inspirational quotes to our wrinkles years from now.

So, to my fellow Presidents and whoever else happens to stumble upon my clumsy words, I urge you all to (with all due respect and admiration) shut the fuck up for one week and take this in. Forget about your personal philosophy and economic opinion and simply be…just for a while. Pages of our history books are being written as we live and breathe, and we seem to have shared an important place in the annals of American greatness for the first time.

But don’t get too comfy, because we are still in the midst of a bona fide shit storm.

Good Morning!
Mr. Cleveland